One of the key determining factors of what you will ever accomplish in life is tied to your confidence. Your confidence sets the tone of what you will dare to go for, how big your dreams will be, how successful your relationships will be, etc… Confidence gives you the strength to plow through muddy terrain, overcome obstacles, re-invent yourself, believe you can actually be a mom (maybe a special needs mom too) AND pursue a meaningful goal, may it be a career, a passion, a business… You are not playing super woman, but you know exactly what you are capable of, and that all the resources and answers that you need are within you or will come to you as you need them. When you are confident, you don’t worry about tomorrow, you focus on today. You know exactly where you are going and you are productive.
Your confidence carries into all of your hats, may it be work, spouse, parent, etc.
Even for those of you that had a fair amount of confidence, the loss of a job or going through a divorce can really shake up that confidence and self-esteem. But you can rebuild it. It’s a time to redefine who you are, who you want to be. It’s a time to get to know you, to really discover what you are capable of.
Something else to ponder about: What are some of the limiting beliefs that you may be projecting on your children? What do you believe that they may not be able to accomplish? That is even more true if you have a special needs child. Doctors tell us lots of things, and we accept them as truth, but our children are capable of surpassing any limit that may be placed on them. If we observe our children at an early age (until the limiting beliefs have been passed on to them), we will see that they are fearless, ready to try on anything, believe they can accomplish anything, and if they fail, they don’t let that get to them, they just keep trying over and over until they get it. They are resilient, if one way does not work, they will figure out another way, they try another approach.
Let’s learn from our children and let them inspire us with the fact that we can do anything as well. Our children learn from us, and whatever limits we put on ourselves and them, is something that will shape them forever.
When you learn to build your confidence, you realize that there is no obstacle that you can’t surmount. It’s that knowingness deep within you that you will find a solution for every problem that you face. When you grow and when you build your confidence, you understand that you are not alone. In fact, you realize that your strength comes from the inside and it radiates to the world. Suddenly other people see that you have this air about you, the way you carry yourself and talk inspires trust others.
Mom, you are stronger than you think. Don’t let your current circumstances tell yourself otherwise. We tend to have this negative self-talk (who am to think I can do this, to dream this big, I deserve the things that are happening to me, why me?). Tell all these thoughts: STOP IT. And start by using positive affirmations: “I am worthy, I am enough, I am strong, I can do this, I will figure it out, I can overcome this, I am the best, I got this….” Whatever you need to hear. Repeat them over and over.
Practice self-love. Start by looking at the things that you really like about you. What are those things? How can you foster them even more and incorporate more of those in your daily life? As for the things you are not so pleased with, think of how those things may have served you. Maybe you don’t like your body, but maybe it brought your baby to life– look at how wonderful that is. Learn to love every part of you. Even your past mistakes, because they make you who you are today, and there is something about you that is unique and amazing.
Want to learn how to rebuild your confidence? Schedule a free coaching session here.